The Wanna Be

I wanna be.

I wanna be more than I am.  I wanna be wiser, more fulfilled, a better mother, more giving, calmer, neater, more prayerful, a better friend, a better sister …happier,  more content.  The list goes on.   Thus, the name of my blog-- I am a “wanna-be”.

I have tried to find the word or phrase that most epitomizes me.  Homeschool mom, mother of four, wife, follower of Christ- these are the essentials of what I am.  But a woman of the same credentials may write to you of smocking or coupon clipping or teaching Latin to her four year old.  Who am I, and how can I express it to you in the cyber realm?

I am a dreamer and I am rarely satisfied.  I love deeply and am deeply loved. Though, I wish I had more to give to those incredible souls God has woven into my life.   Yet, it is this constant longing for more that has fueled my pursuit of Jesus Christ.  It is only in Him that I have found complete contentment.  The gospel of Christ, for me, is. . .that my suspicion that I am less than perfect is, actually, completely founded.  My lack and my selfish bent have condemned me.  However, His spirit has hunted me down and captured my heart.  Condemnation and emptiness are not the end of my story.  Jesus has mystically sacrificed himself for the sake of my healing, and, thus, my emptiness is the conception of His fullness.  Now, through His Spirit, he is bringing forth His perfect vision of me, and He is the one being glorified. 

I am a “wanna-be” and a follower, and I invite you to join me on my rambling quest for the “more” in life.